In Part 2 of my Oklahoma adventure I drove to Western Oklahoma to a town called Cordell to spend the weekend with my friend Melia Douglas and her family: husband Dick (winner of many compound bow competitions and iconic maker of bad jokes), son Cole (he prefers if we refer to him as a talented Gamer), and son Case (aficionado of the game Bejeweled).
When I arrived at the Douglas abode, Dick informed me that in the spirit of The Year of Taking he was going to "take" the bill for dinner that night. Score! Dick also "took" all of us out to dinner and was the designated driver. So I was able to take both his money and time. An awesome start to the weekend if you ask me. Also ate a delicious burger at the Meers Store which is in the middle of nowhere but is truly worth the drive to get there...it reminded me of a lot of mom-and-pop owned restaurants in Austin. Loved the atmosphere and the food. (note for lovers of fried Okra - the place had the best I have ever had) Meers Store & Restaurant
On Saturday, Melia and I drove to OKC to meet a friend of ours, Stacey Harmon Sousa for lunch. (Note: Melia didn't get lost, it was the fault of the stupid road builders who make everything more confusing than it should be. Damn them) We went to Ted's Cafe Escondido which was a bonanza of taking! First, both Melia and I "took" a lot of Stacey's time by showing up late and making her wait in the long line for a table. Fortunately, by taking her time, we were able to stroll in and get seated in about 5 minutes. When the conversation at lunch turned to the topic of resumes another "taking opportunity" presented itself...I was able to "take" the bill and expense it since we talked about topics related to my business.
After lunch Melia took us shopping. This enabled her to "take" time off Stacey's and my lives by creating an opportunity for us to stand around Home Depot while she chose some kind of window covering stuff. I am sure it will be beautiful when its installed and I sure hope so since I spent at least 30 minutes of my life contributing to its ultimate purchase by Melia. While Melia was diligently choosing window covering stuff I walked through the store taking random items (I was NOT shoplifting) and putting them in Melia's shopping basket while she wasn't looking. I found this amusing. Melia was surprised to find spray paint, full-body jumpsuits, and face masks in her basket. She made me put all that stuff back even though I am sure she could have used all those products at some point.
When we returned to Cordell that evening Dick and Melia made an amazing dinner which I was able to take and eat. I also "took" by not contributing anything but my witty rapparte to the dinner preparations. I also "took" some wine.
On Sunday as I was packing to leave I realized that I hadn't really taken anything of value from their house (besides their time, energy, food, and hospitality) so I started looking around for something to take. Melia offered her silverware but she seemed a little to eager about that so I didn't know if it was because she secretly wants new silverware or because she had the cops on speed dial for just such an occasion. Needless to say I steered clear of that potential "taking disaster". So, I kept looking. Melia suggested that I take Cole and Case with me. She even offered to pack all their stuff and put it in my car. I didn't think she was really serious about that one and was, again, concerned about the potential for cops-on-speed-dial, I eliminated the kids from the possible items I might "take".
But then I saw it, the holy grail of possible items I could take: a 14-point buck trophy (deer head to you non hunters) that was hanging on the wall in the Douglas's front hall. But how to take it without being noticed?
Next, how could I sneak out of the house without being noticed?
Totally busted by Dick.
Well as long as I was already caught in the act I decided to fight for it. It got ugly. There was blood shed and tears flowed. Long story short, I lost. The trophy stayed and I had to leave. I heard that the Douglas family is installing a metal detector and gun turrets in their house to protect against "taking".
I don't mind that I couldn't get the deer head/trophy for my year of taking project...I took a lot of other stuff in Oklahoma and this would have been the icing on the cake. You can't have (or take) everything.
On my way out of town (visualize Dick, barefoot in his pajamas, with his shotgun running behind my car while I drive crazily down the street to flee) I stopped for gas and when I got back in the car I found that a fly had joined me for my trip. He hung out on the windshield while I regaled him with stories of the Douglas family and we had a lovely trip back to Texas. Isn't it great that on my way back home I could "take" one more thing in Oklahoma even it if was just an insect? (His name is Norman by the way and he is a Scorpio, likes long walks in the sun, and apparently only had a life span of about 4 hours. We had fun together though).
Thank you to Susan, Melia, and Dick for being such good sports about The Year of Taking!
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